the freedom not to sleep

2024, july 8

when i was a kid and would stub my toe on a threshold, some grown-up would claim: ‘you’re tired. time for bed.’ to me, that’s the epitome of grown-up terror—being told what i feel. but even if it was true, even if i really was tired, why does it automatically translate to ‘time for bed’?

sometimes, staying awake, especially while being tired, is the most delightful thing ever.

recently, i asked my seventy-year-old korean friend when she felt the greatest freedom in her life. she said, ‘right now.’ ‘why?’ i asked. she responded, ‘because i can stay awake as long as i want, i can go to sleep when i want, and i get up when i want.’

the freedom of becoming a grown-up is all about liberating oneself from grown-up doctrines.